What Would Love Be Like Without Sex?

What Would Love Be Like Without Sex?
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When we’re kids in elementary school, all we want to know is, “Will someone like me?”

That precious love, uninhibited by status or money is what I’d like to think is REAL love.

When we become teens, it’s more about status and who has a car. Then once we discover the bliss of sex, it’s about who can stimulate us sexually. We go on with this mentality for decades until we realize that sex isn’t the only reason to love someone. We then look for other qualities like potential for stability and compatibility in values.

Once we’re really old and some of our body parts aren’t working as well as they used to, we long for simple companionship. We want someone who likes to listen to us and look at us.

Through these ages and stages we grow a lot, but I’m beginning to wonder if I may have missed out on something.

See, I have a guyfriend right now who I enjoy being with. Besides the fact that he doesn’t understand me and can’t teach me anything, we have a good time hanging out. He makes me laugh. I can be silly. I can be my REAL self and curse him out or be a brat or be sweet whenever I want to. I like that.

But, and this is a BIG “but”-

He has a very small penis. In fact, when we first met I liked him so much that I wanted to do it with him and I gave him a try but I couldn’t feel anything. I never tried it with him again and we remained friends.

Although I feel comfortable around him and I do not usually feel that way around men, I feel sad that we can never be together because I want to have sex and he can not do it right.

I feel guilty about this.

But then I remind myself that I want to be with someone who can teach me and uplift me, he doesn’t do that. He simply allows me to be me, which I wholeheartedly appreciate.

Do I love him? Yes.
Does he love me? Yes.
Is he there when I need him? Yes.
Do I laugh when I’m with him? All the time.

But I can’t be with him.

And I won’t be because I can masturbate by my damn self.

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