I haven’t tried to be single for 13 years, it just happened like that because I was so angry and hurt over my Baby Daddy but honestly, also because I think I am like a narcissist or something because I don’t ever meet anyone I think is good enough for me.
So I play with guys knowing I would be so sad if they ever loved me and honestly, when I’m with men I always feel like I’m settling and I deserve better. When I have dated women in the past I haven’t felt like that so I am not sure what is going on.
I still haven’t met a woman that I felt was good enough for me either.
Will I be sad if I never hook up with anyone? HELL NO!
I feel so relieved when I do activities alone. I feel so happy when I can go out by myself, I don’t meet anyone or have to entertain any strangers. I feel so great when I enjoy my adventures without anyone’s sabotaging my happiness.
That’s what it feels like when I socialize- SABOTAGE! I hate it and the concept of having someone by my side to ruin my good time on a consistent basis sounds sucky to me.
I have been single for 13 years. I have two amazing sons. I am living my dream (minus the financial freedom but that should come later). I am okay with being who I am, it’s only when others come into my life that shit gets fucked up.
If I believed that there was someone to pray to I would pray that I remain lucky enough to be content with my own company for the rest of my life. Those people searching and hoping for a life partner seem so damn dependent and pathetic to me.
MAY I NEVER NEED ANOTHER HUMAN FOR MY HAPPINESS!